Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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