i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
