HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
he fucked my hip out of place.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
