just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
BRING THE BAGELS
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
