I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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