Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
