what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
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