Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me http://tfl.nu/ldou
  Replies (5) Good night (772) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break. http://tfl.nu/sziy
  Replies (9) Good night (763) Bad night (2076)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them. http://tfl.nu/uwdn
  Replies (25) Good night (3497) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher http://tfl.nu/nr2j
  Replies (22) Good night (696) Bad night (2830)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B? http://tfl.nu/ysr8
  Replies (131) Good night (858) Bad night (8306)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis." http://tfl.nu/rkkz
  Replies (10) Good night (1026) Bad night (3196)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever. http://tfl.nu/jt2o
  Replies (8) Good night (6798) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often. http://tfl.nu/x0j2
  Replies (0) Good night (1786) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.

  (765): View more from Indiana

  yay hump day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra. (765): yay hump day http://tfl.nu/qbqw
  Replies (7) Good night (2254) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  ...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): ...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom. http://tfl.nu/zxa5
  Replies (4) Good night (2960) Bad night (1076)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out. http://tfl.nu/omsw
  Replies (7) Good night (1343) Bad night (952)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional. http://tfl.nu/8oha
  Replies (1) Good night (881) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break. http://tfl.nu/fgur
  Replies (13) Good night (2113) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave http://tfl.nu/1hv2
  Replies (1) Good night (966) Bad night (495)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac http://tfl.nu/kqv2
  Replies (4) Good night (300) Bad night (524)

Randomize