Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
he thought i was a dude.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
