my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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