SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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