No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
