I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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