i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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