i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
