Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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