you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize