I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
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She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
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Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌