I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
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