btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize