A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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