Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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