people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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