Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Randomize
