HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
