come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
