she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
