Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
