so explain again why im purple
no
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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