lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize