If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
