real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
