Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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