seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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