apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
