his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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