your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
