and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I need to sanitize my soul.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
