grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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