I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize