i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
