What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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