.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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