is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
