We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.