Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.

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(512): hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes. http://tfl.nu/z5fi

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(808): View more from Hawaii

It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.

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(808): It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex. http://tfl.nu/n6q7

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(+27): View more from South Africa

I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.

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(+27): I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal. http://tfl.nu/i549

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(214): View more from Texas

She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.

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(214): She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister. http://tfl.nu/9ks8

Replies (37) Good night (8126) Bad night (555)
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(650): View more from California

It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases

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(650): It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases http://tfl.nu/zsan

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(515): View more from Iowa

Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here

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(515): Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here http://tfl.nu/owjx

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(541): View more from Oregon

you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?

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(541): you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....? http://tfl.nu/ofi7

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(404): View more from Georgia

No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.

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(404): No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it. http://tfl.nu/6j8m

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(818): View more from California

Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.

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(818): Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful. http://tfl.nu/9blw

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(330): View more from Ohio

i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.

(614): View more from Ohio

My vagina agrees.

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(330): i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again. (614): My vagina agrees. http://tfl.nu/ii41

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.

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(423): I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex. http://tfl.nu/g9ms

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(410): View more from Maryland

he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.

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(410): he ate me out like he was chugging a beer. http://tfl.nu/i72l

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(248): View more from Michigan

See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...

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(248): See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts... http://tfl.nu/yx0v

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(647): View more from Ontario

I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.

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(647): I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole. http://tfl.nu/34zc

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(317): View more from Indiana

This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.

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(317): This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me. http://tfl.nu/qrey

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