I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize