i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
