I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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