It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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