My first STD was from a foam party
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
